Hello again,
I am sorry about how I have been neglecting this blog but sometimes when you need a break from things you need a break. But people are still looking at it, and that must mean I am doing something right.
I have been feeling a sense of woe, and just general unhappiness in my life. I hate where I live, as that is slowly going down the drain because of a new stupid roommate. I feel like I have done nothing with my life and I was facecreeping people today who I used to go to school with. It is amazing what some of them have done!!! I then look at my life and realize that I haven't done much other than get my education, which is going to allow me to do the things I eventually would like to do. But dammit I want it all now!!! Sadly it just takes time and everyone has different priorities, my priority when I was younger was my now husband and showing him that he can become something. Changing a life is huge, and showing them that they can do anything that they want to be is not something to overlook. But I still feel empty, I am wanting/craving more. I want to live my life and experience different things and see things. All I have experienced is Alberta, and very little travelling.
Who knows, perhaps I am undergoing a change and who I am is changing. All of my new friends that I have made seem to be all the same. Not going anywhere with their life, struggling and popping out kids. My husband and I are nothing like that, we own our house and for the most part fairly comfortable. I mean sometimes we are stupid but I mean we're still young, any mistakes we make (unless really bad) aren't going to hurt us. I do have fantastic old friends who I love and would do anything for. But it seems that the new ones just lead a different life style than us and a dear friend of mine said that "you need to surround yourself with people that you want to be like" and I am realizing just how true that statement is. If we are hanging around people where their entire life is drama, drama, drama, then your life becomes drama as well. I hate drama and I don't want to be part of it. There's drama and then there's being their for a friend, and I don't mind being their for a friend when they need it.
What I believe that is causing all of this our new stupid roommate, a "friend" of ours. He just seems to have no respect for our house, us, or anything for that matter. He just texted me asking me if I am home, and I am purposely not responding because I know that he is going to be asking me for a ride or something. I am not a fucking chaufeur, but you don't deserve my friendship if you have no respect for where I live and worked so hard to accomplish. Leaving cigarrette buds all over our lawn, coffee cups in our backyard, dishes all over the place. His constant bitching about how much his life sucks because of this divorce sucks (well if you didn't treat your wife like such shit then maybe you would be able to see your son) that really was self-inflicted. My husband and I want to move away from all of these people that use us, and are dragging us down with them. We want to move away and start fresh with new people and be more picky about our friendships.
To ANYONE who may be reading, am I being unreasonable???
