Well you are probably sick and tired hearing about how scared I am. But all this fear still radiates from February, I was hurt badly. I felt like my heart was ripped out my chest, stomped on and pissed on. I am so scared of that happening again, I know my fiance didn't intentionally try to hurt me in this way and is trying to rectify it but I am scared of the things that I can't see. Like the thoughts in his head when he sees a beautiful girl, he thoughts when I am not around. What he does when I'm not around, I don't want to jeopardize the relationship that I have because of being scared or creating things that aren't really there. I need help to get over being this deeply hurt because it's not going to go away on its own, it might even get worse. I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy and I do really want him to feel the same way about me, instead of it being something stable in his life.
After taking a couple of hours and coming back to this post, I don't know what else to write. I just need to change my mentality I think and just look at the evidence around me to prove that he cares. Point number one, he sent me a bouquet of roses to my work, he surprised me at work with pepperming patties, hugs and kisses (the candy) and bought me two stuffies.
To my readers I would honestly really appreciate a comment on this on what you think.
After taking a couple of hours and coming back to this post, I don't know what else to write. I just need to change my mentality I think and just look at the evidence around me to prove that he cares. Point number one, he sent me a bouquet of roses to my work, he surprised me at work with pepperming patties, hugs and kisses (the candy) and bought me two stuffies.
To my readers I would honestly really appreciate a comment on this on what you think.
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