Career

So, I work in a public library and I supervise the staff in the department and I ensure that nothing goes wrong. I have a diploma in Library Information Technology, and a diploma in Office Administration. I have been working at the library for almost three years now and the longer I work here the more I wonder if this is really what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. But then I ask myself, if I don't want to do this then what is it that I want to do? Well, I love to do a lot of things but nothing that I can make decent money from. I would love to learn about weather and learn to predict it and understand why weather works the way that it does. Sadly there is not alot of jobs out there for Meterologists. I even thought about training big cats and working in a zoo. But sadly you need to be a zoologist which means I would need to re-take high school courses and increase my grades to get into University. At this point in time in my life I am not ready to take on more schoolign because I still haven't been out of school long enough yet to be fully relaxed to take on a full semester of school. Other than that what do I do with my life? I have no idea, I don't even know what my strengths/weaknesses are. Well I do, but how can you apply it to a lifetime and dedicate it to one career? I feel so lost as to where I should be in my life, where do I fit? Where am i going? Will i be successful? Will I get the things that I want? Can I have a family? Will my marriage work? All of these questions that I don't have answers to, i feel like I am walking in the dark without anyone guiding me and no one wanting to help. I realize that this is my life and no one can really help me, that I need to figure it out for myself. i just wish that someone would tell me that it will be okay. You will be fine, everything will work out and I want them to genuinely mean it, not just to make me feel better. i am so scared about what life has in store for me, i want everything to be what I want and more. I know that nothing is perfect but I want to be able to not have to worry about wether or not I can afford to buy groceries when I next get paid, I would like to not have have to worry if my friends genuinely want to be my friend, I don't want to worry wether my fiance wants to be with me or not. Sadly none of these questions are going to be answered, they take time and I need to work for them. Nothing is ever simple, but by damn I am going to fight for what I want. What else can I do?